Hello there, my name is Colin. My wife Brittany is the creator of this blog, and she asked if I could write a monthly column as exclusive content for The Rinky-Dink Life.
After all, we made the decision to stay child free together, so it only makes sense that we share some of the blogging responsibilities.
And from atop my shiny new soapbox, I’d like to talk about selfishness.
There’s a common belief that couples that choose to live their lives without having children are being selfish.
If you’re reading this blog, you’ve likely heard this before. You’ve also probably heard the notion that we childfree all have the same goals, to “play hard” without the constraint of having children. We’re all pleasure seeking hedonists that think money and an unfettered life brings happiness and fulfillment.
It’s true that remaining childfree opens, or at least widens some doors of opportunity. You can travel more easily without children. You can devote more time to finding your art, your calling, your career, and so on. Does that preclude that childfree people are selfish?
Not at all. It simply means you have more time. How you spend this time is largely up to you.
In my relatively short 30 years of life, I’ve met more than a handful of children whose fathers are not in the picture. The U.S. census bureau indicates that 1 out of every 3 children live without their biological father at home. A staggering 27% of divorced men in America maintain absolutely no contact with their children, according to The Huffington Post.
Could you volunteer some of this time to be a positive influence on the lives of these children if they are lacking a male role model? In the immortal words of Helen Lovejoy, “Won’t somebody please think of the children” who are already here?
If you don’t feel comfortable doing that, there are plenty of other ways that maintaining childfree allows you to give of yourself. Find something that you care about, and have a share in the work. You can improve your community, improve the lives of others, and improve yourself as a person in the process.
So let’s talk about some things you do, or plan to do, with your childfree free time. Have you had a non-parent make a difference in your life? Tell me about it in the comments section below.